perspective

when Noah was really little he wanted to do everything by himself.  He always wanted to butter his own bread but there was no way i was letting him hold a butter knife since it would probably end up in someones eye or something.  Instead, i gave him one of those little cheese spread knives with the very rounded edge and let him go to town buttering his bread.  I would even call it a butter knife.  eventually he got old enough to use a real butter knife but i just called it a knife.  Well, to this day, when Noah wants to spread butter on something, he wants the "cheese knife".  These are just things that moms know.  Last night, Noah asked Allen to hand him a Butter knife and Allen handed him a REAL butter knife.  Noah started arguing telling his dad that was not a butter knife.  Allen, of course knowing that is IS a butter knife, told him that is what it was.  Of course they were both convinced that what they were saying was correct and I had to laugh because i knew they were both right. 

If you think about it from their perspective, they were both right in their little world.  I often think how quick WE are to judge someone else without knowing all the facts.  Maybe we need to just step back, ask questions, and look at the whole picture.  Just think how many arguments could be prevented if we did this. 

I just hope Noah doesn't figure out we have been giving him a butter knife to cut his steak.  hehe 

Music

I love being a wife and a mom!  I wouldn't give it up for anything in the world!  It is absolutely my calling in life and I am happiest being a wife and a mom more than any other thing in my life.  It is hard to think about my life before Allen and Noah were a part of it.   It's funny though how music has played a big part of my life.  I guess i go through stages where I listen to a certain band or singer a lot during a time in my life and then as the times change, so does my choice in music.  I mean when Noah was little I think we listened to the Wiggles morning, noon, and night and now when I hear them (which isn't very often anymore) I think about those times that Noah was so little.  I am brought back to our daily trips to the playground, naps, diapers, pacifiers, etc.  People said time would fly and it does!  Time is flying!

  I recently plugged in my ipod the other day and turned to one of my favorite bands...Five Way Friday.  FWF was a local band just trying to make it big when I was at USC in college.  My friends and I would go to bars that they were playing in ALL THE TIME!  we were what you call "groupies"!  We followed them to different cities and had a blast while doing so!  I used to listen to them morning, noon, and night!  I guess life takes over and I haven't listened to them in a long time.  Well, when i heard the old familiar songs, it brought me back!  It brought me back to a really great time in my life.  A time when i had no responsibility whatsoever, a time when I only had myself to take care of, when I would travel all the time, when my friends and I would drop everything to go to football bowl games (in different cities), Disney World, beach vacations, and movies whenever we wanted.  When I hear Five Way Friday, I think of our midnight IHOP runs for giant cups of hot chocolate and all the fun we had.  It was a good time.   I closed my eyes and just listened to the music, remembering every word of every song and wondering why I don't listen to this awesome band as much anymore.  I am thankful for those memories in my life.  I am even more thankful for the memories I am making NOW..with my family!  But I am thankful for those memories and that I can go back to them whenever I want with just the magic of music! 

Rain Rain

I feel like Noah.  Not MY Noah, but THE Noah.  The Noah that MY Noah was named after!  I feel like i need an ark!  Now, don't get me wrong, I am not complaining about the rain...ALL THE RAIN we have been having.  I know we need it!  I often wonder what Noah thought about when he was on the ark that he built with all the smelly animals, waiting for some spark of hope that it would stop raining just like God promised.  40 days is a LONG time not to see the sun.  He must have wondered if it was ever going to stop, yet had this incredible trust in God knowing how he had fulfilled the first part of God's plan just by building the ark.  I think we can learn a lot from Noah.  We are entering lent..40 days (hmmm...coincidence? probably not!) to think about and asses our life and our walk with God.  What is God calling US to do?  Build an ark?  Collect the animals?  Well, with all the rain we have been having it doesn't seem so far off, but I am guessing that isn't His plan in our lives.  So what IS His plan?  What is God calling from us these next 40 days?  I think it is more than to just give up cookies or ice cream or even facebook.  I think He wants more than just an extra morning or night prayer added to our day for lent.  I think He wants US!  He wants our hearts!  He wants our Lives!  He wants our SOULS!  For Forever!! 

Don't let these next 40 days slip by without examining where you are in your walk with God and what you can be doing in your life to fully strengthen that relationship!  I know I will be doing the same!  

2013

i can't believe I haven't been on this thing since August!!!  I think i have finally caught up on reading my friends blogs since August and now I am ready to write my own!  There is no way I can catch you up on everything since August so I will just start from today...or maybe tomorrow cause tonight i am going to bed early. 

To My dearest Noah,

The other night, Noah started lacrosse for the first time.  It was a new sport, new team, new group of people.  Noah didn't know anyone on the team and I didn't know any of the parents.  Noah jumped right in making friends and I sat on the side with the parents.  I talked with some of the moms, mostly just chit chat.  Some of the moms knew each other because their kids go to school together.  Since we were all sitting on the bleachers together, i overheard the conversation.  They were talking about homework and the massive amount their kids are getting each night.  That led to something else, which led to something else which led to getting into college.  One mom said she was making her son play lacrosse even though he cried and threw a fit because he didn't want to play.  She said she was making him play so he would get a college scholarship at her alma mater (somewhere up North).  Gathering from what I heard, she met her husband at that school, her sister met her husband at that school, her parents met at that school and her grandparents met at that school. Both she and her sister did not want to go to that school and study what they studied (chemical something) but her parents made them go. They told her she had to go and find a "worthy" husband. She just said it matter of factually, without much emotion. She actually said "worthy husband". That was just how it was, there was no choice.  I asked her a few questions and when she asked what I did, I told her i was a full time wife and mom, working part time in catering but that I used to take care of a retired Archbishop until he passed away in November.  She replied "Gross, old people give me the willy's".  After i picked my jaw up off the floor, i tried to explain that it was the most wonderful thing in the world for me. I tried to tell her that i learned so much about myself and i had to give so much of myself during that time. I told her how I had to get way out of my comfort zone on many occasions to help him.  Then she said to me "That is why I want my son to go to (fill in her school's name here) so he never has to work a job like that."   And at that moment, my heart ached for her son.  So what I have to say is for my dearest Noah.

Noah,
You are a joy in my life!  I may not be a perfect mom, but I promise to always love you with all my heart!  I promise you don't ever have to play a sport or join a club that you don't want to play, but I will make you finish the season if you chose to try one.  I promise to help build your self esteem.  I will not force you to choose a career because it is what i think is best, but i will let you choose what your heart wants.  And I will be supportive.  I promise to tell you i love you every chance I get, and even then, it won't come close to how much i actually do love you.  I will give you hugs and kisses forever and ever.  I love everything about you!  I love your willingness to try new things and meet new people.  I hope you realize what a great gift that is to have.  Not everyone has that gift.  I hope that you get the most out of life but while doing so, you give your heart to God. I hope that one day you get to take care of someone who can't take care of them-self. I hope you get to travel to a third world country and see true poverty.  I hope you fall in love.  I wish for you, a best friend.  A friend that you can trust with your life.  If it is God's will in your life, I hope you get to experience the joy of having kids.   I hope you always protect and defend the dignity of life...at all stages!  Most of all, i hope you live your life to the fullest!  You are mine here on earth but you are a child of God!  To truly be happy in life, you have to follow HIS plan, not mine.   But I promise to help you find HIS plan.  I promise to take care of you the best way i know how because you are a joy in my life!
love,
Mom

A Little of this and that..

Holy cow!  It's the end of August already!  I honestly can't believe how fast time is flying by.  Somehow, summer ended and I now have a 2nd grader!!  Noah is loving school and I am so happy about that. His wonderful teacher from last year moved up and took his whole 1st grade class with her.  I am class mom...AGAIN...with 3 other moms.  One of the mom's and I have actually become good friends and we like to take our boys to the skate park a lot in the afternoons. 

Noah starts lacrosse and soccer this week.  This should be an interesting semester doing both sports.  He opted out of boy scouts this year and I am glad he decided on his own because it conflicts with lacrosse and I would have hated for him to have to chose between 2 that he really wanted to do.  I think just getting to each practice a week and 2 games on Saturdays is going to keep us very busy!  Not to mention no one stepped up for team mom for lacrosse so I agreed to it (yikes). 

ABD's birthday was this month and I went and put some balloons and flowers on his grave.  I miss him a lot.  It has been a really hard year for me grieving his loss. 

I never thought i would say this but i have really been enjoying taking Chewy to the dog park every morning.  It is usually the same people every day and I enjoy talking with them while the dogs wear each other out! 

I am really looking forward to the last 13 episodes of FRINGE.  I have been with this show since day one and I really want to know how it is going to end.  I am equally excited about the show Revolution starting this fall.  I have to say, JJ Abrams does a great job producing shows that make you think about things.  I used to really get into trashy shows like Party of Five, Dawson's Creek, 90210, etc. and when i look back now and watch a rerun of one of them, I honestly can't believe I watched such trash!  And i was so addicted to them!  Thank goodness there are actually good shows out there!  I also love the show White Collar!  The relationship between Peter and his wife, Elizabeth, give me hope that Hollywood DOES believe marriages can last! 

Although i am not at all ready for the expense of Christmas, I am ready for everything fall has to offer:  the cooler weather, the changing leaves, the pumpkin carving, the cooler weather, chili in the crock pot, corn mazes, the cooler weather, apple cider, hay rides, cooler weather, a long break from school, pumpkin scented candles, fires in the fireplace, fires in the outside fire pit, and did i mention cooler weather? 

what's going on in your world?

embarrassed

"Mom, you are embarrassing me".  Although i have never heard those words come out of Noah's mouth...yet, i have heard him say these words with a certain face he gives me.  Well, it goes both way my son!  Here's a story that i will remind him of when he tells me i am embarrassing him as he gets older...


First, i need to give you a little background.  A few weeks ago my brother found a huge snake in his bathtub that crawled up through the drain.  It was quite the ordeal for him (he has a huge fear of snakes) to get it out of the house.  Later that night he was talking to Noah about the snake and he asked Noah if he knew what the most poisonous snake was.  Noah answered "the Black Mama".  Although my brother and I tried to convince Noah it is called the Black MAMBA, Noah was certain he was right and we were wrong.  so whatever, we just let it go. 

So, a few days ago Noah and I were in Target.  As always, Noah likes to go in the toy section.  As we turned down one of the aisles, this sweet African American lady with her baby stopped at the end of our aisle.  Noah is going up the aisle and sees a bunch of rubber snakes. Noah starts yelling in excitement and about 50 decimals higher than his usual outside voice "A BLACK MAMA, A BLACK MAMA, MOM, I SEE A BLACK MAMA!!"

I quickly (and very loudly) starting saying "Mamba, a Black MAMBA, Mamba"  I think i said Mamba about 20 times over and over..which of course caused Noah to yell (he was soooo excited) "No, Mom, a Black Mama".    The poor lady at the end of the aisle just gave a funny look and moved on.  I can only imagine what she (and anyone else within 50 feet) was thinking.  I was mortified!  Noah SWEARS he saw it on the Animal Planet that is is called the Black Mama.  Oh Noah!  In the future when you are with your friends and you tell me i am embarrassing you, i will remind you of this moment!  Thank you for keeping my life so entertained!